Giving less gifts this Christmas is triggering my anxiety

This Christmas I decided to scale back on gift giving and over spending on Holiday experiences.  After finishing all the wrapping,  I saw the amount of gifts I had and it triggered a panic attack.  I am not kidding here, I know it sounds absurd but not giving a lot of gifts this year triggered an anxiety shock inside of me.  I quickly went on Amazon to buy a few more gifts to ease my alarming nerves.  I know that last sentence sounds obnoxious but it’s true.  My love language for showing love is gift giving.  So I show my love by giving the people I love multiple gifts.  The more gifts I buy, the more love I am showing you.  So when I only saw a few wrapped gifts, I panicked because I didn’t want to disappoint any of my loved ones.  I didn’t want them to think I stopped caring about them.  This is how my mind works as a hoarder.  I attach an extreme value to ordinary items.  In this video I share more in depth on my mini Christmas melt down: